Friday, June 26, 2015

Love Wins!

There are moments in your life that you remember forever.

I remember exactly what I was doing when I found out Princess Diana died; I was watching late night TV in my parents room because they were out of town and I was watching the dogs. I watched what I thought was just a documentary on her life until I realized it was actually a memorial because she had died.

I remember where I was when the second World Trade Tower fell; I was standing in my bra in my living room along with a dozen people from my apartment complex that didn't have cable, clinging to my phone as my mom assured me that my uncles who were pilots were all already on the ground.

I remember where I was when space shuttle Columbia exploded (I don't remember Challenger I was a little too young); I was actually woken up by my mom because the shuttle exploded over my college town showering it with debris. Yes I slept through the explosion.

These were all disasters and horrible events that are forever etched in my mind.

Today is a day that will be etched in my mind, but this time for all the right reasons. Today is a joyous day where justice is done and love wins. I will always remember sitting at my desk at work, being thankful that I didn't wear mascara, as I cried tears of joy for all of my friends and loved ones, and everyone everywhere in this country, who can now enjoy the same right I have been enjoying for over a decade.

As of today any person in our country can marry any other person in this country, regardless or race or gender. In a 5-4 ruling the Supreme Court of the US ruled that states can not keep same sex couples from marrying and must recognize their unions.

I really think that Justice Kennedy said it best: 

"No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family. In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than once they were. As some of the petitioners in these cases demonstrate, marriage embodies a love that may endure even past death. It would misunderstand these men and women to say they disrespect the idea of marriage. Their plea is that they do respect it, respect it so deeply that they seek to find its fulfillment for themselves. Their hope is not to be condemned to live in loneliness, excluded from one of civilization’s oldest institutions. They ask for equal dignity in the eyes of the law. The Constitution grants them that right." -- From Justice Anthony Kennedy's opinion in Obergefell v Hodges

 Yes there will be plenty of people that think that this was a bad decision. Yes there are plenty of people who think that our country is going straight to hell for this. Yes there will be plenty of angry grumbling and ugly displays over this. 

I am sure there was the same sort of outrage in 1967 when SCOTUS ruled in Loving vs Virginia that interracial marriage was to be legalized. While there are still some people who think that was a bad decision, most everyone doesn't even bat an eye at interracial couples. I am fairly certain if you asked most school aged Americans that they wouldn't even know that interracial marriage had ever been illegal. 

I hope that when I have children that they will never even realize that once people were once not allowed to marry because they were of the same gender. It may be my grandchildren who are blissfully ignorant of such hate, but today's ruling is where it starts. 

For all of my friends who are married and happen to be the same gender, congratulations on your marriage now be recognized all across the country. For all of my friends who are unmarried but may in the future at some point want to marry someone who happens to be the same gender, congratulations on the ability to do so anywhere in the country. 

Remember marriage is hard, and marriage is a struggle, and marriage is not for the faint of heart. It is a lot of work, but it is so worth it. It is a wonderful bond that is hard to quantify in words. It isn't all romance and sunshine. It won't always work out. You will fuck it up on occasion, and sometimes you won't be able to recover from that, but sometimes you will. It doesn't matter if you are black, or white, or male, or female, we are all human, and being human we are horribly flawed and we all now have the right to embrace the flaws of the ones we love most, without boundaries or barriers. 

They say love is blind, and they say justice is blind. Today justice is blind in all the right ways and erases those barriers that have stood far too long.

What will you say when the next generation asks you where you were when marriage became equal for all?

1 comment:

  1. I love you beyond words. We are beautifully flawed and stitched together with hope.