Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Babies babies everywhere...

...But none for me, yet.
No I am not pregnant, lets just start this off right. Someday, Gods willing and the creek don't rise, I will be. Today is not that day. A number of my friends however, are currently pregnant. Several of them have been trying very hard for a very long time, and I am so overwhelmingly happy for them. Several other of my friends have just delivered a baby in the last month or so, and again I am overwhelmingly happy for them. Babies are a very happy thing.

All this good baby fortune however does make one start to think about such things. I have always wanted children and so has the husbeast. In fact he would have been happier if we had started having children before he turned 30, which was five years ago. I was so incredibly not ready to have children at 25. I was entirely too selfish five years ago to have children, and I knew it then.

Children require a lot of attention and quite a bit of sacrifice. I have seen it with my friends with children. They have to pass on a lot of things because they have children, and the children are the priority. I am not saying had I had children at that point I wouldn't have loved them and sacrificed for them. I am simply saying I wasn't mentally ready to do that. I wanted a little time alone with my husband to enjoy being a married couple before we became a full on family.

Am I ready now? Five years later just having turned 30 myself, am I now ready to not be so selfish? I can't really say that. I want to think I am. I want to think that I am ready for such a step in my life, but how can I really know that? I mean really I am not certain anyone is ever really ready to be a parent. You can think you are all you want, but in the end I think it is always a shock. How could it not be?

So am I ready to be a parent? I don't know. Am I willing to be a parent? Yes very much so. Am I rushing to be a parent? Not in the least. All things happen when they should, and I am certain babies are no different. So when the eventuality of a baby does happen for me, I might not be prepared per se, but I will be ready to take on whatever comes my way.

1 comment:

  1. In the mean time, I'm so very glad that our little Freckle will have you & the husbeast around to share your stories with them.