Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Boundless Friendship

When I was a kid I always imagined that my friends would be my friends forever. It is an idealistic view of friendship that we have as children that is proven wrong before we have left childhood. The fact is that for the most part the friends we have as children rarely last into adulthood.

There are many factors that lead into this; distance, lifestyles changing, and simply growing into different people. Even the friends we make in high school or college do not necessarily make it into our adult lives. Sure we still Facebook stalk those people, but being a Facebook friend is not necessarily a strong friendship. Friends can not survive on Facebook alone.

Of course when I was a kid I don't think I truly understood what friendship entailed. I never would have imagined that friendship had no limits on age, or distance, or time. I never understood what seemingly insignificant gestures make a friendship strong.

I have many friends, which is not something I have always been able to say. When I was young I cold count my friends on one hand with fingers left over most of the time. These days I have difficulty listing all of my friends. This is a problem I am happy having.

Of course some of my friends are closer than others, but that is the way of friendships. The nature of a friendship can change over the course of the relationship, growing closer or further apart, but still you are friends.

Two of my closest friends are the living proof that there are no limitations on friendship. One of these amazing women is ten years older than me while the other is almost fifteen years younger than me. We live far enough from each other that seeing them can be an effort, but one always worth the trip. We have very different lifestyles yet we seem to be on the same page more often than not.

We were out to dinner the other night and my phone began to ding. The Husbeast looked over at my phone and then at me and simply asked "What are the girls talking about now?" because he knew that was who was trying to get my attention. He was right, and it was them, it almost always is.

This unlikely friendship with my Niki and my Beth seems so unlikely. Beth is a young college student who we met through faire. While there are plenty of people closer to her age on cast Beth seemed to click with us from the start. Even though we have only known her around 9 months most days it feels like she has been part of our group for years.

Beth is our sassy little translator to the youth of today that I didn't know we needed. I refer to her as our own personal urban dictionary, a role which she fills with gusto. I forget how young she is right up until I find myself needing to know what 'rachet' is supposed to mean, and then I recall Beth is hip with the slang of today.

We chat constantly, and I find it comforting to know that all I need to do is look at my phone and my girls will be there. We watch TV together which is nice for me being a TV addict to have someone who is watching the same shows with me at the same time. American Horror Story is a great show, but being able to talk to others that love it while actually watching it makes it all that much better.

Pop culture aside, they really are amazing friends. I know that no matter what they have my back. Even if it is the smallest of things, I know they will be there for me, and that is what friendship really is.

As a geyser of water was shooting out of my wall flooding my house it was Niki and Beth I was messaging in a panic as I tried to remember the name of the water removal company. After the water had been shut off and the proper people called to come dry out my house, and I was laying on the floor crying, they showed up in their pajamas to sit with me so I would have some moral support.

There was nothing they could do to fix what had happened. They couldn't make the water go away, or fix a pipe, or save my brand new carpet pad, but they could sit with me and make me smile. They could stay up with me until 2am and remind me that as long as I have friends like them it wouldn't even matter if the walls would never dry out.

I am sad that I have lost friendships through the years. I am sad that distance and time has pulled me away from people that I love. I do know though that they will always be my friends because some things simply can not be changed.

I am very glad for the friends I do have, and especially for my girls. I cherish all of our silly TV watching, GIF filled chats, inside jokes, and middle of the night moral support. I am so very glad that the ideas I had of friendship as a child proved to be wrong, and friendship turned out to be so beautifully limitless.

I love my friends.

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